i love you so much that the pain is still there deep inside
the love i do not wish to fell any more the love i have no
wish to embrace because of not wanting it to hurt the
little i cling onto for the time being but it fights to take
over fighting ever to return to the surface and take over
once more.

The more i fight the more i resist the harder it become
the more i hurt myself and the more i see you seamingly
not care the more it fights to be let lose the more i resist
the more it pushes other emotions of anger and the more
i become angry for still feeling this for you.

so the more i supres these emotions seing your beutifull
face and sit chatting the more i wish to just pin you down
and have my way. But i fight to controll these emotions
for the love you have banished from your heart still resides
in me and acting upon these feeling would surely push you
away.

So i am here once more and trapped between feeling of love,
insecurity, hate and fear. I tourment myself knowing nothing
can ever come of these feelings so fight once more and perhaps
in time these feeling will subside. But it makes me happy as well
to see you smileing and being happy again to be able to sit and
just chat about random stuff. so these felling emotions again and
again rise up and boil beneath the surface and i wish i could
express each and everyone of them but i must remain calm
and always respect the wishes of the other.